Alphonse Island, The Seychelles

A remote paradise in the Indian Ocean

Alphonse Island, a five-star idyl on one of the Seychelles’ most entrancing Outer Islands is possibly the most remote and paradisiac place I’ve ever been to. Situated just south of the equator, Alphonse Island is not just far, but many light-years from the madding crowd. The island has no cars, no TVs and only designated areas with internet signals which locals jokingly refer to as “coconut Wi-Fi”.

A breathtaking arrowhead-shaped outcrop in the Indian Ocean clothed in floppy palm trees and ringed by brochure-ready white sandy beaches, limpid blue waters and a bountiful coral reef, Alphonse is the ultimate dreamy desert island.

I am desperately trying to avoid the cliche of comparing it to the pristine, empty beaches featured in that famous Bounty advert, but that is very hard, as it really doesn’t get any more get-away-from-it all than this. If this place doesn’t instantly send you into a Zen state, then nowhere will.

The sea around Alphonse Island is beaming with life, examples of which are hawksbill turtles and the variety of reef fish.

Rounding the end of the coral reef, our little band of snorkellers suddenly come face to face with a hawksbill turtle. But as we stop to watch on in awe, this majestic creature is completely oblivious to our footling presence. Gliding effortlessly through the water, the magnificent hawksbill is a picture of elegant, unflustered tranquillity. It is sailing past, clearly without a care in the world.

Exactly like us, in fact.

Service is impeccable. For instance, noticing one evening that I am struggling to get a connection to call my mother, the extremely helpful receptionist offers to let me use the hotel landline to phone her for free. Now that’s what I call service.

The food is equally impressive at Alphonse Island. The kitchen serves the freshest possible fish. One day, we catch a 1.5 m long wahoo on a “kitchen run” fishing expedition, and that very evening it appears on our table as the most delicious sashimi, paired with a delectable passionfruit sauce.

At Alphonse Islands, chefs optimise the use of plant foods from the resort’s own garden and local fish.

Sustainability is very important on the island, whose abundant kitchen garden provides 80 per cent of the fruit and vegetables for the delightful beach restaurant.

The accommodation is top-notch, too. The island has 22 Beach Bungalows, five Beach Villas and two Beach Retreats, which are all beautifully decorated in aquamarine colours and enjoy uninterrupted views of the ocean. They are very cleverly positioned for total privacy.

In a brilliant touch, all accommodations are equipped with the sort of outdoor showers usually only seen on I’m a Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here! (without the voyeuristic cameras broadcasting to millions of viewers back in the UK, of course.)

View of a Beach Retreat Bedroom and the plunge pool in one of the five Beach Villas at Alphonse Island.

The greatest attraction of Alphonse Island, however, is its powerful, direct connection to the natural world. The island simply thrums with nature. You are never more than a minute away from your next encounter with a dazzling example of wildlife.

The snorkelling, for example, is off the charts. Bobbing on the surface above the reef, you feel like an extra in Finding Nemo. The almost bath-temperature Indian Ocean plays host to more colourful fish than you can shake a go-pro stick at.

All accommodations have their own bikes which you can use to explore the island, and with no cars at all, the only thing that might cause a traffic jam is one of the island’s giant Aldabra tortoises.

In the wild, Aldabra tortoises are only found here, in Frégate Island and in the Aldabra Atoll of them in the Seychelles. They are mighty beasts. Without any predators, they plod around the island with the natural-born authority of animals which know they are masters and mistresses of all they survey. They also exude a sense of wisdom that stems from being over 200 years old. It is thought some were born around the time of the Battle of Waterloo.

Alphonse Island is one of only three places in the world where one can find Aldabra tortoises in the wild. It is also a privileged location for those seeking to swim or dive with Manta Rays.

Setting foot on the nearby deserted St François Island for a conservation walk, I feel like a member of an exploratory team from Star Trek who has accidentally been beamed onto an alien planet. It quickly dawns on me that is actually very moving and an enormous privilege to be one of the very few people in the entire history of humanity to have set foot on this unspoiled paradise.

At one point, we are confronted by a pair of land crabs aggressively snapping their claws at us like lads itching for an after-hours fight in a pub car park. When we softly approach them, though, they scuttle sideways in a superb, synchronised formation routine that would have earned them full marks from the judges on a dance competition. “Strictly Crab Dancing”?

The final highlight of this ridiculously relaxing trip is the “Flats lunch.” You cruise 45 minutes from Alphonse to “the flats”, a chain of sand bars on St François, where diligent staff have already set up parasols and a marvellous buffet lunch, accompanied by a pleasing soundtrack of top tunes. At a distance of 250 miles from the nearest town – the Seychelles capital, Victoria – you may well be attending the world’s most remote barbecue.

As our sandbar gradually disappears under the incoming tide and the warm waters of the Indian Ocean lap over your feet, the sound of Dolly Parton’s “9-to-5” wafts towards us. The 9-to-5 has never seemed so far away.

Author: James Rampton

Rates start at £9,057 for a Beach Bungalow for a seven-night package per person sharing. For more information on Alphonse Island, visit www.bluesafari.com, and on the Seychelles, visit www.seychelles.com

Opening image: Flats lunch, Alphonse Island

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